With Arthur Smith, John Finnemore, Henning Wehn and Holly Walsh. Topics are on wasps, Oscar Wilde, computers and Boris Johnson.

”[…]Farfalle make excellent makeshift bowties for hamsters.”
*bzz* “They definitely do!(etc)”
“It’s interesting, yeah. I mean, it’s not one of the facts John’s trying to smuggle past, but… I mean, they would, you’re right.”

John’s speech on The Unbelievable Truth, this time telling lies about pasta. If you don’t know it, The Unbelievable Truth is a radio panel show hosted by David Mitchell, in which the panellists are given a subject and have to make up a speech consisting mostly of lies, but with some truths. The other contestants have to separate the truths from the lies and buzz in when they think they have a truth in order to get points. I might not have explained that very well. Merry something-th of Finnemore advent!

The Unbelievable Truth Series 9, Episode 2: A panda is not a massive bloated cat 

• John Finnemore: The giant panda is a large black and white bear. No, of course not. No, to what will be David's fury, the giant panda is either an enormous brown and white racoon, or a small pink and white rabbit.
•  *BUZZ*
• David Mitchell: Henning.
• Henning Wehn: I might not come across as incredibly stupid, but a panda -- that is a black and white bear, no?
• David: You're right; it is. Yes, you've cut straight through it there. To my delight, a panda that looks like a large black and white bear we are allowed, officially, to call a bear. Only recently has that been allowed! It was not until 1985 that DNA analysis finally established that they're bears and not raccoons. You can see what the scientific community wanted to do: It wanted to look at what is obviously a massive bear and say 'Oh no, it's an insect; it's a massive bloated cat; it's a rocky outcrop. But no; bad luck scientists; it turns out it looks like a bear, and it is a bear.

“I waited three years [for Victoria]. Isn’t that weird? Aren’t I odd? I can’t explain it other than to say I couldn’t do anything else. If only I’d known I just had to wait three years… I would gladly have suffered 10 times as much.” 

• David Mitchell: But Henry VII is an answer to quite a few questions. "Who won the Battle of Bosworth Field?", for example.
• Jimmy Carr: Yeah, but that wasn't the question.
• David Mitchell: No, if that had been the question, then this would be the correct answer. So, in many ways, is it the answer that’s wrong? Or the question?

So which one of them is Colosson then?